1/2 Amercan 1/2 You're a Peein'

4:06 AM Posted In Edit This 0 Comments »
Adventures in cloth diapers! Sounds like a name of a good movie for sure! Julie's niece Christine gave me the opportunity to go cloth on my bodily-function experiences. It's not that the parents wouldn't go with it - it's just that she sold them on the notion as well as was too kind in letting me borrow her newborn ones. Considering my small (yet oh so future model) stature - I look like a tiny Sumo-wrestler in the giant underpants. By the time the cloth goes into the protective Velcro-holster, I'm ready to enter the ring and take on any kitten!

We did many a thing since I last spoke. Went shopping, ate, you're a peein', ate some more, went to Finley Market and bought some kookumbers & 'maters. The paparrazzi (or was that papazoli - not sure) didn't have his camera with him that day so here's another shopping experience at some big-box retailer - Target probably. Look at that guy next to me just staring at the sky with some weird expression on his face. Hey! I'm trying to sleep here - no funny facial-expressions while I'm sleeping! He's not even wearing a shirt - isn't he freezing in here? The AC must be like set to negative Siberia or something - yeesh! I have my peeps bring a blanket wherever we go - I have them trained well. Going from lizard-conditions outside to meat-locker requires drastic measures.

OK, what else happened... Oh yeah - slept a lot. Well, you're all thinking why I'm even bothering to write down the fact that I slept - I mean - what kind of boring writing is THAT!? You're reading, though, right? My sleep MUST be entertaining for you to still be reading. Can you hear me now? Good!

Mom keeps me company while I nap - she's a good napper - I taught her well. Though as you can tell by the photo - the papazoli with his camera just can't stop so of course I block him from view. As to mom and her oh so lovely jewelry fashion sense - well, that's to be admired. She dresses up for me for when we sleep. That little gem you see on her finger is a 7.5 carrot (organic of course) Tiffany-inspired Cumi-ring. "Cumi" is pacifyer in Hungary-talk - weird language - will have to tell you more about that later. Something about an addiction to letters in the alphabet or something. And what does Hungary have to do with You're a Peein'? I have no idea - again, must be some weird cultural thing - I'll find out eventually.

Anyway - sleep is not the only thing I did - also went out. And I don't mean like just outside - I do that 'a plenty! I mean I party. Sure, there's a company picnic but that's just playing politics - I mean go out to happy-hour and such. That's right - you heard me - I hang with the crowd on a Friday as I please. This time it was in Hyde Park at some coffee place - sipping down a latte (decaf-no froth-extra rich-natural... I'm very particular!). I was hangin' with my peeps as well as with Karen and Kyle, who was kind enough to let me know how to make a European (I'm sure he meant You're a Peein') trip memorable. Something about lots of drinking (hence the excessive pee) - surely it was milk - I'm a little fuzzy on that - I think he was too...

No camera shots of me there - good thing too - any more and you'll think of me as Paris Hilton! I don't even resemble that remark! I would never carry around my kitten as an accessory! They would just climb right out of my diaper bag! I'm a dignified and dare I say it graceful lady who only spits up when deemed required and usually only on my parent's clothes I do not prefer. What's wrong with that? They can't go out in public looking like that? Somebody has to tell them!

So I leave you with an image of me thinking of my next great adventure. I do that a lot - think even in my sleep of the many great things that I do DO and will do. I'm very sophisticated like that. Kinda' a big deal, you know. Hope these parents of mine can keep up...

CBT - As easy as 123

8:42 AM Edit This 2 Comments »

HEYO!

It's Sydney again - and I'm here to tell you that life is good. I don't mean it in the superficial way of cold-cash-oozing-from-pores-while-tanning-on-a-45-foot-yacht-off-the-coast-of-Bali - good, I mean it's good in the HEYO!-look-at-me-I'm-so-cute!-good...
Ok, that sounds a little ego-elevated... take it as you will... heyo.
Mom & dad this week are on a schedule-crunch as suitors of Sydney-watchers are rounded up while Julie is on dog-bite-break. Oh, I didn't tell you? Yeah, Julie, my caretaker got bit by her dog and needs to mend her wounds before she could play with me. In the meantime it's been a combo of mom/dad/aunt/Bellla-mom (Bella is a dog, licker - not a biter)/and kittens... though the kittens are kinda' worthless as they don't take me out for walks and such - they shed and complain... They're ok - but they mostly entertain than anything else - they really need to learn how to change my diaper! You expect ME to do it? I'm too cutie-licious for you babe! ;)
ANYWAY - onto more info - it's been a while so I have to catch up. I've been playing in the swing laughing at the flying monkey, playing on the mat laughing at the bird, and just plain laughing at everything - it's just too funny out here in the real world!

Speaking of funny - Sirius wants to get in on the action and be carried around too so I let dad give him a spin in the Bjorn - he dug it. Problem is that now he thinks he can go walking with us and such. Sorry dude - no comprende loco gato! That's all the Spanish I know until I start watching Dora in a few years. Mom/Dad are pretty strict with that wall-picture thing they call TV. It's bright lights and flashes - could give me seizures - probably a good thing I'm off the stuff - need to learn how to work the DVR anyway - commercials suck - I'm typing in fragments - can't stop - need to potty.

Phew! Weird event there, sorry.


Not much else is going on except the usual burping and the butt-burping. I get Mylicon squeezed into my mouth for the butt-burping - the box says it tastes like cherry, but I know from personal experience that it tastes like dish-water - not that I know what dish water tastes like, I'm just saying - well - you know what I mean.

Ok, I'll leave you with a lasting image of me at Habanero eating a stupendous platter of fried chips with salsa - YUMMO! Though now I know what they mean when they say "It'll hurt twice." Ooof!
Oh, and if you're wondering about the title, you'll have to ask mom/dad as they keep calling me that and I have NO idea what they're talking about!
Sydney - out












Encore!

6:15 PM Edit This 1 Comment »
Encore! Encore!

The people have spoken and after a little hiatus, I’m back! Sorry for the delay, but I’ve been very busy with my full schedule of eating, sleeping, pooping and peeing. While I was away, I was also busy getting my acting resume together.! Too young for showbiz, you say? You can’t keep a good Thespian down!

The Headshot






Nice, eh? World-renowned photographer, Zoltan Lebowitz, did a photo shoot with me last weekend. He was going for the “just woke up from a nap” look. You like?

Resume
Name: Sydney von Diesel
Age: 6 weeks
Height: 2”
Weight: a lady doesn’t tell! Ok, I’m not quite a lady yet (propensity for burping, farting and spitting up in public), so 9 pounds-ish. A svelte 9 pounds-ish ;)
Experience:
Drama: Poop Fiction, Hungarian-American Beauty, Paws
Action: Raiders of the Lost Fart, The Born Ultimatum
Comedy: You Don't Mess with the Zoltan, Blazing Swaddles, Met My Parents, Hungarian Pie, There’s Something About Sydney
Dinner Theater: It’s an autobiographical work in progress




My next film starts shooting in September, 12 Angry Airline Passengers.

Stay tuned for more updates…or just tune into Entertainment Tonight and the National Enquirer. Oh no, here come the paparrazzi now!!